What We Deserve
by Marauder Lupine
Summary: Remus Lupin and Severus Snape survive the war. Years later, they run into each other. As their tentative friendship grows, Remus realizes he wants for more than just a friendship. Severus though, thinks that Remus and Teddy are more than he deserves and has difficulty letting go of the past. - Will be SLASH, Also features Teddy, Draco, Harry.
1. Chapter 1

AN: This is my first attempt at dipping my quill into the Harry Potter fandom. Be gentle, if you will.

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"Teddy, don't go too far up now."

"I won't, promise."

Remus Lupin watched as his son climbed higher and higher into the large tree at the park they were visiting. Remus and his son Teddy first visited the little village while they were traveling. Apparating long distances was difficult enough, but with a little boy in tow, it was necessary to make a few stops along the way. The quiet village sat on a hilltop, close enough to smell the salty sea air from the water down below, but just far and high enough to have a beautiful view of the cold ocean. There were a few grander homes down below, ones with great staircases that led straight to the beach below.

Remus much preferred the view from up on the hill though. It was nice to breathe in that cool, ocean breeze, but he wasn't too interested in having the ocean meet his yard.

"You've still a bit of a cold, remember. You know it makes it difficult to keep your form."

Remus sighed and watched as Teddy balanced himself on a thick branch and then hopped across to a smaller one. The little boy had taken his shoes off and his feet were two furry little things clutching at the tree limbs like a monkey's.

"Dad, did you see that? " the little boy shouted proudly. "Harry says with my speed I could play Seeker one day. I just need to work on my bal-al-"

Remus jumped to his feet, hoping to reach his son in time, but he was a just a few steps too late. As Teddy sneezed, his furry feet morphed back into his own. He lost his footing on the precarious branch. He slipped and fell to the ground, the grass not helping to ease the impact of the fall. Teddy feel hard and landed awkwardly on his arm, groaning in pain.

Sliding to his knees beside him, Remus cradled his son, minding the indubitably broken limb. "Teddy, are you alright? Did you hit your head?"

For the briefest moments, he considered Apparating all the way home, but he knew right away that that would only cause more danger. He had to find a public Floo. Before Teddy could answer his question, Remus scooped up the small, crying boy and made his way back to the small village where he could Floo back home and find help.

While people stopped and stared for just a moment, no one made much of a fuss over the thin man with graying hair or his small son. Had he been in his right mind, he would have been paying more attention to the people around him. Even after the war, it was something he couldn't help but do - pay attention to those around you. Secure the area. Watch out for your own.

Nearly toppling over, but thankful for his lycanthropic abilities, Remus' steps merely faltered a bit when he ran into another body. Quickly, he found his step and kept forward, forgetting the niceties for once, he threw a simple "'m sorry" over his shoulder. It wasn't until he heard that familiar voice calling after him, that Remus stopped.

"Lupin?" was all that the voice said, but Remus knew that velvety tone well enough to sigh in relief.

"Severus, oh, thank Merlin," he said as he turned back to the man he'd bumped into. "Please, can you mend bones?" Severus Snape, for the first time, caught a glimpse of the boy tucked against Remus' body. With his thin, villainous lips pressed tightly, he gave a terse nod and took Remus' elbow, leading him into the furthest corner of a huddled group of cottages that lay at the west end of the village.

Closing the door behind the two visitors, Severus finally spoke. "Sit. There," he pointed to a sofa. Remus did so, with Teddy in his lap. "Please, Severus, he's in pain."

"I haven't the slightest how to mend a child's broken bone," Severus answered, grabbing a handful of powder from on top of the mantle. "I know a Healer from St. Mungo's who does."

Teddy and Remus both looked at each other, frightened even more than before. Teddy began to clutch at his father with his good arm.

"No!" Remus said, the fear evident in his voice. "No healers, I thought you could help him." He stood up and grimaced as Teddy gasped out in pain at the jostling about. "Thank you, but I'll just take him home. If we could just use your Floo."

In his panic and worry, Remus hadn't heard Severus make the call. "Don't be ridiculous, Lupin. Neither one of you is in any shape to travel. The boy will be just fine in a few minutes, so just sit down." Severus moved away from the fireplace just as the flames flared green.

When Remus saw the golden blonde, young man step from the fireplace, he let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding. He slumped back into the sofa, smoothing back Teddy's hair to reassure the boy he was going to be fine. "Dad," Teddy whispered, his pain and worry just as clear as his father's had been moments ago. "It's okay, son. You're going to be fine, just stay calm and try not to move, alright?" Teddy gave his dad the best smile he could muster, knowing that they'd discussed what Teddy was supposed to do in situations just like this.

Draco Malfoy stepped closer to Remus and Teddy, kneeling before them. "I'm going to take a look at your arm," he said, trying to sound less threatening and intimidating than he usually did.

After running his wand over Teddy's broken arm, Draco stood. "I need him to lie down here." Remus hesitated, but did as he was told. Teddy, lying down, trying hard to control his tears in front of these strangers, did as Healer Malfoy told him as well - to lie very still, and try not to flinch as he ran the tip of his wand over the broken limb.

Remus watched as the young man who had once threatened his life years before worked to heal his son. He fidgeted as Teddy took a spoonful of whatever potion Severus had handed to Draco. "What is that you're giving him?" Draco huffed, offended that Remus would question his skills. Severus spoke for him, "a very mild sedative and pain relieving potion." Remus nodded, and saw his boy's arm glow slightly and return to normal.

"Done." Draco said, draping the boy's newly mended arm across his stomach. Remus moved to sit by his son's side, gave him a small smile and said, "All better, then?" Teddy smiled up at his dad, and said a quiet "Thank you," to Healer Malfoy.

"Now that the boy's taken care of, are you going to share with us just what happened to him, causing you to come barreling through the village?" Severus spoke with his usual sarcastic, accusing tone of voice.

Remus allowed himself a small chuckle. Always the professor.

"He's much like his mother," he said, smiling down at his son, again smoothing back his golden brown hair. In an instant, that golden brown hair turned to a violent pink shade, causing Remus' smile to widen.

"A metamorphagus," Severus said, mildly impressed with the boy's abilities.

Draco, who had run his wand over the boy once more, scowled a bit, marring his handsome face. "A bit like his father too, isn't he?" he snorted, directing a glare at a suddenly white-faced Remus.

Severus snapped his attention between the small boy with drying tears on his cheeks and to his rapidly paling father.

"No!" the boy shouted, sitting up, fighting through the soreness he still felt in his arm. "I'm a metamorphagus only. Like my mother was."

"That's why you were so frightened by my calling a Healer. He's," here, Severus' voice faltered for what Remus thought must have been the first time ever. "He's like you. A wolf. Unregistered." He snarled, not at all hiding the familiar hatred in his words, which Remus had come to expect from Severus.

"Please, Severus, Draco," Remus knew what he must have sounded like, begging these two men who had just helped him, but now was no time for such frivolous things as pride. He clutched at his son's hand, wondering if he'd even be able to Apparate from inside the house. Surely Severus would have wards to prevent them from doing so, but he had to try, if it came down to it.

"Don't take me away, please. I'm all my dad has. He needs me." Remus couldn't help the tears from forming in his eyes. He closed them for a moment, as his heart clenched at hearing his son's pleading. "Please, just let us go home," he said.

After a long, intensely silent moment, Draco stood up and looked to Severus. Severus gave him the slightest nod and Draco turned back to Remus. Remus was sure he was only aggravating his son's injury, but he held tightly to his hand nonetheless.

"Give him another spoonful of this in the morning," the young man said, holding out a small vial. Taken aback, Remus mindlessly took the potion, keeping his grip on Teddy, who was looking up at his dad, and keeping his eyes on Draco's grey ones. "I've no interest in taking him to St. Mungo's, but if ever you should run into a Healer in an emergency, you ought to inform him of his condition."

"I'm sure you know that lycanthropy can affect the potency of a potion," Severus finally spoke. Remus wasn't sure what to think about the seemingly calm and unbiased words coming from a Malfoy and Snape.

"Can you stay for tea, Draco?" Severus spoke again, after the stunned silence became too loud for him to stand.

Draco shook his head, "No, unfortunately. I've got a patient who needs seeing to soon." Draco looked down at Teddy, "You, you'll keep those bones in one piece, you understand?" Teddy nodded his head, earning just the slightest smirk from the young Healer.

"It's a shame you don't invite me over more often, Godfather." Draco teased the raven haired man. "Once you claimed the second largest bedroom as your own, I didn't think it necessary," Severus quipped, walking over to the fireplace with Draco. Draco gave his apparent Godfather a dazzling smile before grabbing a handful of powder.

Snapping himself out of his daze, Remus let go of Teddy's hand and walked over to the two men saying goodbye. "Thank you, Dra-," he paused and smiled a bit. "Thank you, Healer Malfoy. For taking care of Teddy. And for not reporting him to St. Mungo's." Draco gave him a nod of acceptance. "The Prophet," Remus hesitated, "They're wrong. I can see you've become a fine, young man. You're not like your father; I hope you'll take that as a compliment." Draco opened his mouth to speak, but simply nodded.

#####

Severus sat at his kitchen table, sipping his morning tea, grumbling to himself over The Daily Prophet. "Worthless," he said, throwing the paper to the floor beside him. "Incendio," he said with a flick of his wrist, and followed it with another flick and an "evanesco," to get rid of the burnt remains of the paper. He loathed Rita Skeeter and her articles about Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived Twice, and his career, and his wife, and his friends.

Even more so, he hated the articles about young, Healer Malfoy, who was rumored to have plans of holding St. Mungo's hostage until his father was released from Azkaban, and his murdering Godfather, who hadn't saved the young boy's soul from an awful deed, but instead took great pleasure in being able to kill the one man who had seen the sliver of decency in him. The same man who had offered forgiveness for his unyielding servitude.

The night he had begged not to be killed or taken to Azkaban, he hadn't believed he would be asked to murder someone he had grown so close to, to see as the father he never had and wanted to please, at no matter the cost to himself.

Severus sighed, he would never get used to the knowledge that Albus Dumbledore died at his hand. Not that he would ever let himself. He killed Albus, and lived through the final battle, there was no amount of suffering he could endure to make up for that. He hadn't wanted to live to see Voldemort's demise; he'd done his job, given Harry Potter all the information he would need. He was to be left to die there in the Shrieking Shack. Insult to injury he told himself as he had lain there, bleeding out slowly.

He was going to die there, in Lupin's little lair. He was sure the spirit of Sirius Black had been laughing at his expense. But none of that had mattered really. He had been prepared to die, to go willingly off to where ever souls as black as his were sent.

He hadn't though. The same selfish man who had first gone over to Voldemort's side had been happy, grateful even that Potter had been kind enough to tell Draco where his supposedly dead body could be found, after the battle was won. The bitter, self-loathing man he truly was however, had been devastated to hear footsteps approaching him that night. He was meant to die, after all the blood on his own hands.

When he opened his eyes and caught Draco's tired grey eyes staring at him, his face nearly as pale as Severus'. "It's just a bit of blood," he had coughed out, the blood seemingly pouring out more freely with the little effort. "Quiet," Draco had said, shaking himself free of the shock of seeing his godfather bleeding out. Immediately, Draco set about sending up a signal to call for help. He took out the anti-venin potion Severus had discreetly given him months before and poured it down the other man's throat.

"Draco," Severus had said, swallowing the potion without a fuss. "No, be quiet, please, rest. Mother will be here in a moment to help you to the castle." Severus nodded, resting his hand on the boy's forearm.

In that moment, realizing he wasn't going to die there, he was grateful for the chance to see Draco one last time, even if it was only to be taken away by the Aurors as soon as they got wind of him being alive. He'd have some satisfaction in knowing his godson was alive, and safe.

With another sigh, Severus emptied his tea cup, and set about his normal day.

He was only slightly angry that he was unable to brew a potion Draco had requested, as his trip to the market had been ruined before purchasing the proper ingredients. He knew he couldn't delay another trip for too long, but he was in no hurry after the surprise events of the day before.

Delaying another trip, he began brewing another potion that had been requested. It was a simple potion, one that he could mindlessly do. Doing so though, caused his mind to wander to people from his past, whom he wasn't supposed to have run into.

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Severus Snape wasn't allowed any sort of happiness, that's what he had concluded long ago. There were four exceptions to that though. Draco was one of them, the only lasting exception, another was Lily Potter's friendship, that had been cut short, made null and void when he caused her death, his relationship with Albus was ruined when he was asked to risk not only his life, but the last shred of goodness in his soul and ordered to kill him, which he had, lastly, was his ever-present attraction to Remus Lupin.

That too, wasn't anything great. He was attracted to the man, but he still hated him most of the time, hated his friends. He could allow himself to feel both attraction and hatred for the man. His attraction was never going to be reciprocated, so it didn't matter anyway. He didn't deserve to have his feelings shared, after all.

Remus Lupin was always a quiet one, even more so it seemed when his friends were teasing and hexing him during their years at Hogwarts. He could take care of himself though, and gave as good as he got most of the time. While it had been the job of a Prefect to stop such actions, Severus hadn't need the other boy to come to his aid.

When he'd learned that Remus was a werewolf, Severus had been terrified, and angry, and bitter that his own feelings hadn't been taken into account on that awful night. Sirius Black hadn't been properly punished, and he hated that it had been James who'd saved him. No one cared that the greasy Slytherin had been nearly killed, so long as he didn't say a word about it.

However, even that incident hadn't kept him from stealing glances at Remus during class or in the Great Hall. Half the time, the looks were filled with hate and anger at what he was and what he had nearly done, the other half were of longing. Had the incident at the Shrieking Shack not happened, and had Remus not been friends with Potter and Black, they could have been friends.

But Remus was friends with Black and Potter though, and the incident at the Shack were as real as the three claw scars left on his chest. By the time Remus had come back to Hogwarts to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts, he had grown into the cold, bitter man he was now. He realized very quickly that his attraction was ever present, his wanting for it to be something mutual, though was no longer an option he was willing to entertain.

Severus had been far more jaded then he ever was. He'd already had blood on his hands, the blood of Remus' friends. It was better for him to forget the wolf completely, but he had been so damned polite and pleasant. He put forth his best effort to keep the man at bay, which was quite easier than he had anticipated.

All of the talk and rumors of Sirius Black had made it much easier. It was easy to be cruel when he remembered how the two had been friends, how one of them led him to be killed by the other.

But then, he'd learned the truth about Black. He hadn't wanted to believe it, but he hadn't the choice. The headmaster had believed it, and so he had no choice but to take it as truth.

The anger he felt at being made a fool of once again by Black, and by Potter Jr., and Remus, by mere association, had made him spill the secret he had promised to keep as a boy. Remus was forced to resign from his position.

All that, and it hadn't even worked.

So still, he admired from afar. He allowed himself bits of that particular happiness whenever he felt brave and strong enough to endure the pain, guilt, and anger that often accompanied it. It was quite complicated, his attraction.

When he could steal a glance at the man at Order meetings, see the smile that reached to his eyes or hear a breathy laugh escape his lips, and feel brush of fingers when he brought the man the Wolfsbane potion - he enjoyed them completely, if only in secret.

That had worked well enough for him. He could allow himself that much at least.

Draco, and only bits of Remus - smiling, and laughing, and especially the bits of touching.  
That was enough.

#####

It was well into the afternoon that same day when Severus had heard a screeching at his kitchen window. He'd left his potion simmering in it's cauldron to allow the small, spotted owl into his cottage.

The owl had hopped obediently onto the back of a chair and held out its leg. Severus took the bit of parchment and offered the owl scraps of toast, which it ate before flying back out the window.

Severus was sure the letter wasn't from Draco, but nearly no one else knew where he now lived. He'd left Spinner's End after the continuous Howlers and poisoned letters demanding he send himself to Azkaban for the crimes he'd been exonerated of.

He carefully opened the letter, noting that it smelled not of acidic residue meant to poison him, but instead of the slightest hint of chocolate. A scent he always associated with Lupin. He unrolled the parchment with a little more speed, wondering only in the slightest, if his potions could have caused any sort of bad reaction to the young boy.

He sat again, at his kitchen table, and began to read.

**Severus,**

**It's just occurred to me that I wasn't able to thank you properly for your quick reaction and help yesterday afternoon. I neither apologized for bumping into you down in the village market, nor did I even finish telling you what happened. My manners are usually much better, I assure you.**

**Teddy and I would both like to thank you properly however. We'd like to cook you dinner sometime, if that would acceptable for you. For you and Healer Malfoy both, if he is available, of course.**

**We await your owl,**  
**Remus & Teddy**

Severus swallowed the small lump forming in his throat. Thank him? Remus seemed jumpy and cautious of being here. Why would he want to come back? Certainly he wouldn't tell anyone that he was here, would he? He wouldn't tell people how the once intimidating Potions Master now spent his days reading and tending to his garden, would he?

"No," Severus said aloud to himself.

Most people took Remus' quiet, polite nature as passive, but Severus knew better. Remus was always genuine, he wouldn't offer his thanks if he wasn't sincerely thankful.

Severus stood up and went to check on his potion. After setting the caldron aside to clean itself, Severus leaned against the worktable and pondered the offer.

He didn't need anyone coming to pity him, or to make him dinner. Truth be told, he was a rather fine cook himself, thanks to his skills as a Potions Master. He rarely used those cooking skills however, he usually only did so when he knew Draco would be coming over for dinner. Most of the time, it was just him in his little cottage. He ate out of necessity, what was the point in having a grand meal when there was no one else around with whom to share it?

More than once, in his final months, Albus had told Severus that when the war was over, after Harry had destroyed Voldemort, he would be free of all debts and could live his life free of all the burdens he was tied to. Albus promised him that everyone would know the best of him, that the world would no longer see him as a former Death Eater, but as the true man he had become.

That had not happened exactly.

Some people still saw him as a Death Eater, but the majority now saw him as a murderer. Which he was, Severus could not deny that. Albus had been wrong about his future. He hadn't cared very much then; he hadn't expected to make it out alive after all.

Severus shook his head with a confident determination; Albus was never wrong, perhaps he could have something more than the isolation he'd always known.

Grabbing a bit of parchment and a quill, Severus scribbled in a harsh handwriting his reply to Remus and his son.

**That would be acceptable, at your convenience.**  
**SS**

Severus sent his own owl off to deliver his response. He, of course, was unable to focus on his potions, no matter how elementary. All of the fear and doubts he'd ever had that Remus was no different from his friends crept into his mind, threatening to drive him mad if he didn't find someway to preoccupy his mind.

He gave in, pulling on his coat, he headed to the market in the grey, drizzly weather.

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While I have pages of this already written, it's only in pieces. It may take me a while to sort through it all and make sense of it. Bear with me, please.

Also, I tend to not do much editing, so I will try my best to keep any small errors and typos to a minimum. As for big errors, please feel free to point them out.


	2. Chapter 2

**_Annabeth_****: My first reviewer here, thank you. I'm glad it's caught your interest. I hope this will keep it a bit longer.**

**Also, thanks to those who favorited or put us on alert. Much appreciated.**

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Severus quickly checked himself over in his bathroom. He stared at his reflection in the mirror in its tarnished frame. He subconsciously straightened the collar of his shirt, then scowled and scolded himself when he realized what he had done. Or more likely, why he had done it.

Who was Remus, that he had to try to impress him. He didn't. He huffed proudly, and cursed himself. He wondered if it was too late to their dinner plans.

Severus glanced at the clock in the hallway as he walked to the study to await his guests; Remus and his son would arrive shortly. Despite his best efforts, he found himself restless and unable to keep from wondering if accepting the offer of thanks was a mistake. It was indeed too late to change plans.

After a few moments pacing the study, he forced himself to stop. He was acting ridiculous, he knew, but he couldn't help himself.

That frightened him slightly. It was so rarely that he felt himself unable to control is body and mind. He'd go mad with unease if he didn't stop and settle his mind. So he did. He forced himself to steady his breathing, and clear his mind.

When he had done that, he forced himself to sit in his favorite arm chair, the one that, despite the years he'd lived in this village, with the woods just outside his cottage, with the rich scents of tree and earth, and the ocean at the bottom of the hill and the salty sea air, still smelled of the comfort he found at Hogwarts, in his dungeons.

Somehow, magically perhaps, the arm chair still carried the ever-present chill of his quarters too. The chilliness still managed to take his breath away for just a moment on the hottest of summer days. Concentrating on the smell of Hogwarts, and the chill of his dungeons, he relaxed.

He sat, staring at the fire, his legs crossed at the knee, right over left, just as he had so often at Hogwarts. It was his home; had been since he was just a boy. It had been more special to him than his own home at Spinner's End. He rested his elbow on the arm rest and held his chin in his hand, and he closed his eyes. Sometimes, when he was nostalgic and lonely enough, he could do just this, and it seemed almost as if he was still there.

Just beyond, he could pretend, were his young charges; the children who turned into teenagers and then into young adults under his tutelage. While Slytherins were fiercely independent by nature, they were still kids. They came to him seeking advice, like the Gryffindors went to Minerva, the Ravenclaws to Filius, and the Hufflepuffs to Pomona. In that sense, his Slytherin students were no different than any other students at Hogwarts.

But they were certainly different in other ways.

To steer the children of Death Eaters and families with pure-blood prejudice in the safest direction, while maintaining his secrets, was a daunting task. But one that he took to heart completely. He did his best.

He was hard on his students, they wouldn't expect anything less from their Head of House, but even still, his Slytherins were the only students who ever stood up to protect him against the other gossiping dolts he taught. He didn't ask it of them, and was always stunned when he heard of any instances. He appreciated their respect and admiration.

Albus always told him he was doing everything he could do to protect them. And he told himself that many times, over and over.

But he hadn't; he had failed them completely. Of course, there were some Slytherins who had joined the battle that last night. But even some of them, those who out of self-preservation or otherwise, had decided to fight against their families and friends, had not lived to see the end of the battle.

Days after the battle, he had woken up in the hospital ward, his neck bandaged, his body so tired he felt he could sleep for months, his vision blurred, his blood itching - all effects of the snake's venom. He wasn't sure he'd survive the battle, hadn't expected to, really. Both sides of the war would want him for betrayal. It was with relief and, while he'd never admit to it if the subject was brought up, with tears, that he recognized Draco, sitting beside his bed.

It had taken him only a few minutes upon waking up to remember what had happened, how Draco had found him in the Shack and called his mother for help. He remembered the anti-venin, and Draco talking to him softly, with tears of his own streaking down his young, pale face.

Draco had said he'd passed out just before Narcissa and Lucius arrived to help.

In the following days, it was Draco and with more relief, a few other Slytherins who visited him during his brief bouts of consciousness. Each familiar face he saw was a boulder lifted from his chest. He had succeeded with a few of them, it seemed.

It was nearly two weeks after he'd woken up that Draco finally informed him that a few of the visits he'd had were Auror-escorted. Some of his students were being held by the Ministry for questioning about their families and housemates who'd been captured.

The others, the ones who were no longer being detained, were staying at the castle, helping with repairs, as they had no where else to go - orphaned after the battle.

He had spent a total of three weeks in that hospital, in and out of consciousness, while Madame Pomfrey tended to his poisoned body. She, apparently, had refused to let him be taken to St. Mungos, where they both knew he'd be treated unkindly and most probably wouldn't get the proper care he needed. He was, after all the promises and saved lives, still a murderer. So, there he stayed with Madame Pomfrey and Draco Malfoy, in the hospital ward at Hogwarts.

Finally, his mind was eased and relaxed. He slumped further into his chair. One of the few relics he was willing to take from the only home he had ever known. He let his mind continue to wander and relished the sights he could so clearly remember.

He remembered the hospital ward - across the corridor that led from his dungeons, and up three flights of moving staircases. He remembered Madame Pomfrey, who had healed his bruises at the start of term every year when he was a boy.

"You're underfed, boy. I think you've managed to lose what little weight you put on last year. Oh, dear. Bruised again, Severus?" He had lied to her, said he just didn't like his mother's cooking, and that the boys in his neighborhood were bullies.

"I'm fine now." He had said to her, genuinely meaning it. At Hogwarts, he was safe. Of course, he had the likes of James Potter and Sirius Black to bully him, but they, he could handle. It gave him confidence being at Hogwarts, it was his home, and no one was going to bully him without a fight.

She'd known, of course, that those bruises he came to school with, weren't all from bullies. As far as he knew, she had kept his secret. Or at the least, whomever she told, made it a point to never make it known they knew as well.

Years later, when he had returned to Hogwarts to teach, she still chastised him for not eating properly.

"Years of the same food, day after day… diligent workers they may be, but creative cooks the house elves certainly are not." She glared at him before he nodded, silently agreeing that he would eat better, all the while, trying to keep the smirk off of his face.

Of course, when he'd come back to the school after a meeting with Voldemort and had given his prompt report to Albus, she was there to tend to his bruises then too. Most of the time, they were wounds and aches he could heal himself, with potions he kept stored just for such occasions, but she'd never allow it. His tired body, thoroughly aching from bouts of the Cruciatus curse or other foul hexes, would find itself in the hospital ward before he'd known it, and she had taken care of the rest.

No one ever told her why he sometimes left the castle for hours at a time, at all hours of the night, or why he'd come back hours later, scrapes, bruises, and aches littering his body. Of course, she had known the truth about that too, he was sure. The slight, usually rock-steady hands would tremble when toweling his face after a post-Cruiatus seizure took his body was what always gave her away. She was a great mediwitch, after all; she knew what caused those seizures.

He smiled ever so slightly, playing with a loose thread on the arm chair that reminded him so much of his old home.

Not all of his memories were the happy; he had quite a few that were quite terrible, actually. Though in his year as Headmaster he had betrayed the castle that gave him such comfort, it was still home. He missed his dungeons, the pitter-pattering of rain against his classroom window late at night while he graded essays, violently marking them with his red quill.

He didn't deserve to have such fond memories of his home, but he was a selfish man, and was glad to have them.

He could never go back, but it was calming that he could still remember how it felt to be within the comfort of the ancient, powerful magic that had protected him, and everyone else within its grounds.

####

A flash of green just beyond his eyelids stirred him from his memories, and when he opened them, he wasn't surrounded by those high, stone walls, but instead by Remus Lupin and his son. The two of them brushing a light coat of soot off of their robes.

Smiling, Remus found Severus' eyes. The crinkles around them softened though, studying the seated man. He looked tired, and older than he had the other day. He was a bit pale too, even more so than usual. He held his son's hand, but stepped closer to Severus, who was pulling his body from the arm chair with notable reluctance.

"Are you alright, Severus?" Remus asked quietly, not wanting to alarm Teddy or set off a possibly angry or upset Severus. Severus saw, quite clearly, the concern in the wolf's blue, searching eyes more than he heard it in his voice. He nodded once, "fine," he said, making a note to be more careful around the man and his penetrating gaze.

Lupin was perceptive and intelligent, and very cunning. Severus suspected he could have easily been sorted into any of the four houses. But what nearly killed the boy only made him stronger, braver when he got to school - and so he was placed in Gryffindor house, where dwell just the sort.

Catching the other man's eyes for a moment, Severus noticed that, like the sun's rays beaming and reflecting in the icy ocean, Lupin's blue eyes shone and glittered with a hint of golden hues.

That, Severus suspected, was a result of his lycanthropic condition. They were the only bit that wasn't entirely shabby on the man.

In what he hoped was an imperceptible gaze, he quickly noticed that what he had assumed as shabby was actually neat and modest, in a tired and worn sort of way. He looked well, he settled on after a moment of consideration.

####

Remus and Teddy wore their best robes for the evening. Remus' were of an almond brown color, while Teddy's were a deep plum. Severus chastised himself for thinking how wonderfully well the robes brought out the golden hues in Remus' eyes and complimented the tawny of his graying hair.

"Ah, Severus, I hope we're not disturbing you. I know we're a bit early." Remus said, noticing Severus, still sitting in his arm chair. "No, not at all." Severus managed to say, feeling as if he was caught staring. He stood up and stepped closer to his guests.

"Teddy, let's not be rude, say hello to professor Snape." Remus gently pushed his son in Severus' direction, urging him to say hello. Teddy, a bit shy and probably intimidated by the Potions Master, croaked out a "Hello."

Severus bent at the waist, shortening the height difference between him and the small boy, and extended his hand.

"Hello, Teddy. I see you've managed to keep yourself in one piece. Well done." Remus smiled.

Teddy, growing bolder, stuck up his chin, and shook Severus' hand, saying, "It's an honor to get a chance to meet you properly, professor Snape. My father has told me a lot about you."

Severus raised an eyebrow and looked to Remus, who shrugged another smile.

"I assure you, Teddy, whatever he might have said, it's blatant lie." Severus said to Teddy, standing up straight. "And there is no need to address me as professor Snape. I gave up teaching a number of years ago. You may call me Severus."

"Can I see your potions lab, Severus?" Teddy asked excitedly.  
"Teddy," his father reprimanded.  
"Sorry. May I see your potions lab… please?" Teddy tried again. Earning a much more stern, "Teddy," from his dad.

"Perhaps a bit later," Severus told him. He'd never had to deal with children this young, only Draco, and Draco had been quite a handful, if his memory severed him correctly.

####

Remus made his way into the kitchen, his little assistant just behind him. "What are we going to make, dad?" he asked, bouncy around the counter while Remus enlarged the bags he pulled from his robes to their rightful size.

"Well," he said to his son, in a pleasant tone. Remus scooted things out of is way, pushing aside whatever Severus had left on the counter. Severus had the distinct impression that Remus was making himself very comfortable in his kitchen simply to see the sneer he was sure he had on his face. "I thought, perhaps we'd make our world-famous roast chicken, how does that sound?" Remus said.

Teddy smiled, "That's not what I meant, and you know it." Severus quirked his eyebrows at this, wondering what the boy had meant.  
"Ah!" Remus feigned. "I've chilled a flask of pumpkin juice to serve with dinner."  
Teddy tried to pout through his smile, "Dad" he whined, stretching out the word.

"Oh, and we're having Teddy's Chocolate Tarts for dessert." Remus finally gave in, his own smile brightening at Teddy's wide eyes. "Didn't I mention that? Would you like to get started?"

Teddy nodded so enthusiastically Severus was sure he'd give himself a neck injury.

Remus laid out a bag of things Severus couldn't see, as Teddy had shielded his space on the back counter with his body. Remus left Teddy to his work and turned to Severus, smiling. Severus felt that maybe their shared gaze lasted a tad longer than necessary, but it was broken when Teddy said, "Oh Severus, you are going to love this. I'm sure of it!"

Remus turned to see his son hunched over his workspace, and was pleasantly reminded of a young, Slytherin boy whom he had often been paired with during double potions classes.

Severus watched as the two continued to work. The less they had to talk, the better. It gave him time to think and consider his moves more thoughtfully.

When Remus glanced up at him from behind the counter, catching his eyes, he smiled a bit.

This forced Severus' strategic thinking to other areas. Those eyes.

They were very pretty, he admitted to himself. And served to remind him how dangerous the man could truly be, not only during the full moon, no, but whenever he turned his gaze to you.

Remus was a man who didn't need his advanced werewolf perception to know what someone was thinking. He was a man who had dealt with enough tragedy of his own to recognize it in others, even the most skilled Occulmens.

Now that he could think freely and clearly without being interrupted for a few moments, Severus could contemplate that sharp gaze.

He told himself it was a habit of his, of any true Legilimens. The eyes told stories beyond the reach of the heart, mind, and mouth. For Severus, the eyes were life, death, truth, and everything in-between.

He thought about it; perhaps Lupin's blue and golden-rayed gaze wasn't comparable to the ocean. His gaze pierced deeper than even that, if you knew just what you were looking into. He let himself think about it some more.

Remus Lupin was a people-person, despite his affliction. Most people didn't know, of course. He was quiet, and tried to not call any attention to himself, but it was his eyes that drew people to him. They were quiet, but demanding, inviting, and very dangerous.

The blue of his eyes was so icy and fathomless, but never cold, unless provoked. One couldn't help but be drawn to them when they turned to you. They were inviting and welcoming, unless you crossed his path, in which case they were dangerous. You would never know just what he was capable of.

The darkest, deepest, midnight shades of blue was where he drew into himself, where he kept his secrets to himself. Remus Lupin was a quiet man, who preferred to keep to himself. Those dark, deep depths was somewhere someone might not be able to learn those secrets so easily, and without first gaining his trust. He can't hide the darkness completely, it's there in the open for everyone to see. But they'd never know what it truly meant, until he let you into the darkness himself.

And if the darkest hues represented his secrets, then the golden streaks were shooting stars of every happy memory Lupin had. There probably weren't very many, hardly noticeable when looking at him really. To see those, you had to stare deeply enough, search the entire galaxy, and then you'd see them. When you found them, you'd see them highlighting even the darkest paths with their beauty.

Severus wondered about those streaks of gold.

####

"Severus," Remus said, finally settling himself to setting utensils to operate themselves on various leafy greens and colorful vegetables.  
"Do you require any help?" Severus asked, interrupting him.  
Remus grinned, "No, no, this dinner is to thank you, Severus, it wouldn't be very polite to ask for your help, now would it?"

"I was only going to ask," he continued when Severus sat back with a grumpy huff. "How have you been? It's been so long."

Severus' eyes narrowed, his old habit of being leery of people's motives were hard to break. Not that he particularly cared to break this habit. It served him well during the war. It was always good to question motives. He had been at the mercy of questionable motives and held others at his mercy with his own.  
Hearing the giggling coming from Teddy, and Remus' eyes turning to him once more, waiting for his response, Severus found it was actually easier than he expected to let go of those questioning thoughts.

"I have been well, thank you." Severus said, taking extra care to guard himself once again.. "And yourself? In the short time I've known him, your son already strikes me as a handful." Remus laughed, and Teddy looked over at them as if he was offended.

"Yes, you're right about that." Remus finally said, a small smile still gracing his face. "Teddy is a handful. Aren't you, son?"  
Teddy turned back once again, trying his best to glare at his father, "I am not. I have just the right amount of energy and curiosity. Just like my mom when she was my age. That's what my gram always said."

Teddy had already turned his attention back to his tarts, so he didn't see the flash of emotion in Severus' eyes, or see the sudden stiffness in his dad's spine.

Remus cleared his throat after what seemed like a long moment and then answered.

"Yes, I suppose you aren't too terrible." Remus looked up to see Severus with a guarded look on his face. He hadn't thought about what to do should someone bring up something that was probably too uncomfortable to talk about.

He wasn't entirely sure how Severus felt about Dora, but he was quite certain it wasn't likely a topic that should be brought up. If what he knew about Severus still was true, though he highly doubted that it was, it wouldn't be fair to talk about Tonks to him.

After a bit of small talk, Teddy announced he was finished with his work. He made sure that his efforts were concealed from Severus' curious eyes.

Teddy set the table for three and then asked, "Will Healer Malfoy be joining us?"

Severus shook his head, "No, I'm afraid Draco sends his regrets. It seems there were a few witches and wizards who thought it would be a brilliant idea to test out transfiguration charms on each other after a night of drinking fire whisky."

"They didn't!?" Teddy exclaimed. He was young, but he was smart. And such a hair-brained idea seemed too ridiculous even to him.

Severus lowered his head a bit, to speak directly to Teddy. "They did," he said. "And can you imagine the ghastly sorts they've transfigured themselves into?"

Teddy cringed though his smile peaked out. "I don't think I want to. Half wizard, half flobberworm? I bet poor Healer Malfoy is covered in mucus!" He laughed out loud, and so did Severus.

Remus took a moment to appreciate how much a simple laugh could lighten Severus' face. It made him look ten years younger, as if he hadn't fought and barely survived a war. And he didn't miss how his son continued to describe vile scenarios just to make his new friend laugh.

Remus admonished them both before finally placing the dishes of food on the table. "That's enough you two. You'll ruin dinner for me." He couldn't quite let his own smile drop though.

"Can you imagine that, dad?" Teddy said, still laughing. "Those poor people. I'm going to make sure to pay extra attention in aunt Minerva's class."

"Aunt Minerva?" Severus questioned. Teddy nodded, grabbing a roll of bread from the basket before passing it to Severus.  
"Yes," he offered. "I'm going to be top of her class, she says. But I shouldn't expect to be treated any differently than the other students. Even if I am special to her."

"Of course, she isn't really my aunt. I just call her that." he continued after taking a bite and wiping his mouth. "Oh, we forgot the pumpkin juice, dad. I'll get it. Excuse me."

Severus smirked. "He is awfully polite for being so young. Though, I suppose I shouldn't be so surprised, as he is your son."

"And just what does that mean?" Remus asked sarcastically. "Yes, he is." He sighed then. "He's growing up too fast."

Looking up to see that his son was carefully filling glasses of pumpkin juice at the counter, Remus continued, "He's too young to have already lost so much."

Severus was struck momentarily speechless. How was he supposed to respond to such a statement?

When Severus looked up from his plate, Remus was staring at him again. This time, those golden streaks were a bit harder to see.

Remus sighed to himself, "I'm sorry, Severus. I shouldn't have said anything."

Severus nodded. "I was sorry to read about Andromeda's death in the Prophet. I always liked her, despite her bloodline. She knew before I did, what I was. She was always trying to keep me away from Lucius."

"What did she know?" Remus wondered.  
"She knew the darkness in me," Severus answered so casually, taking a bite from his fork.

Remus frowned. Is that what Severus thought? After everything that he'd done, that he's full of darkness?

"I think she saw the light in you, Severus. She saw it in me, too. Otherwise Teddy wouldn't be here," he said quietly.

Just as he finished his thought, Teddy walked over to the table and carefully placed two glasses on the table.

"Thank you," Severus said, though he wasn't quite sure to which Lupin he was speaking.

####

"What in Merlin's name…" Severus trailed off as the dessert dish was placed in front of him.

"It's a right mess, I know, but it's completely edible, I assure you," Remus said, trying not to laugh at the face Severus was making. Teddy meanwhile had no problem giggling at the reaction his creation caused the stoic professor.

"After you, Severus. I insist," Teddy held back his giggles long enough to watch Severus give his dad a look. When Remus didn't interfere, Severus huffed and grabbed his spoon.

If he had to stomach the mess to please the boy, he was going to do so with as much poise and dignity he could muster.

After his first bite, Severus was surprised at his ability to keep the spoonful of chocolaty mess down. He was also pleasantly surprised that he found the mess quite good. Under the chocolate cream, there were bits of crumbled biscuits and a spoonful of caramel at the bottom. It was incredibly too sweet, then suddenly, there was a hint of sea salt, which cut through the sweetness. He was surprised once again.

"It's quite good, isn't it?" Remus asked when Severus gave Teddy a satisfactory nod. "I don't know how he does it, really. I tried making it once, for his birthday-"  
"It was terrible!" Teddy finished for him, already digging into his own tart.

Remus laughed and took a bite of his own, "it really was," he finished.

Severus laughed too. "You know Teddy," he started after another bite, "cooking and baking aren't so different from potion brewing. Perhaps you'll have an affinity for potions."

"I suppose that's why my cooking is such rubbish," Remus added, smiling at his boy. "I was always rubbish at potions."

"You weren't complete rubbish, Lupin," Severus said, surprising Remus. "You kept up all the times we were paired together. And this meal was more than satisfactory, I assure you. Thank you to you both."

Severus tried to hold back feeling he got when he received two beaming smiles.

Sitting at the table with his two, highly unlikely guests, Severus felt lighter than he had in quite some time. In the early years of the second war, Severus would allow himself to imagine what it might be like once the war was over. When he could walk freely, no longer tied to masters or old memories.

After he had killed Albus, he knew that would never be possible. Not that it mattered, that late in the fight, he wasn't convinced he'd live to see the end of the war anyway.

But he had. And the darkness that swept him off his feet as a boy still weighed heavily in his chest for entirely different reasons now. He had wanted power and acknowledgement, but when he yielded that power in order to kill Albus an all new darkness had seeped into his veins and deep within his bones.

Somehow, for some reason, after being the cause of so much pain, it eased the pressure to see Remus smile; to be the cause of his smile and to make his little boy laugh. It made him feel better.

####

After another hour and a half of pleasant chatting, Remus and Teddy said their goodbyes to Severus.

After they'd left, Severus found the silence of his home almost unnerving. What was worse though, was how quickly he found himself disliking the solitude he had so longed for in the past. He was always so careful, but one evening had shaken his foundation so suddenly. He wasn't sure how to feel about it. He couldn't let one evening of gratitude tamper with his life.

Soon, Draco would stop by for dinner and stay for a couple of days, and soon Severus would return to his work. Nothing will have really changed. One evening of company was nice, but it wasn't something that would happen again, and there was no point in hoping otherwise. He couldn't allow it to matter so much.

It was a week later, two days into Draco's stay, that Severus received a letter from a familiar spotted owl. Severus opened the letter:

**Dear Severus,**

**Dad is taking me to the park near your cottage on Saturday afternoon. I am writing you to ask if you'd like to join us. I promise not to climb too high up the tree this time.**

**I hope you'll say yes.**

**Teddy**

Severus smirked at the letter with large, clumsy script in his hand. He found himself smirking at what the letter said. Teddy was an adventurous and curious little boy, he didn't for one moment think that he would keep too low to the ground.

A sudden hoot from the owl drew Severus' attention and he noticed another letter attached to the birds talon. He removed that one as well, opened it and read it.

**Severus,**

**Teddy hasn't stopped talking about you since dinner last week. After his accident, I promised to take him back to the park and he asked right away if he could invite you. He will understand if you have other plans, of course, but we would both be quite happy if you cared to join us.**

**Remus**

* * *

As I noted before, this is my first attempt at writing for the Harry Potter fandom. I hope you're all enjoying it thus far. **Reviews** are appreciated, very much. Thanks.


	3. Chapter 3

So many wonderful comments from you guys, thank you so much! This is coming slowly, so I hope you'll all be patient with me. Again though, your comments are so appreciated. Keep them coming, it's always a delight to have a new review.

* * *

The first time he had written back to Remus and his son, Severus had a feeling of unease.

He was curious as to why he wasn't as uneasy now, after having replied to them both separately. Of course, he hadn't sent them off yet. He'd do that in the morning. His one owl was currently off delivering a letter to Narcissa Malfoy.

As he sat at his desk, an opened book to one side as he scribbled a list of the ingredients he would need for a potion he was to start working on soon, he spared the scrap of parchment with the untidy and rather large handwriting a quick glance.

He didn't deserve the chance at a friendship with the man he had secretly longed for, for too many years he was unwilling to admit to even himself. And he didn't deserve to be looked upon as a hero, like Teddy had so casually called him.

Severus had some qualms about accepting and indeed, encouraging and hoping for, friendship with this particular man. But he'd always been the self-destructive type. He'd deal with whatever can of worms it opened. He was too selfish to turn away.

Not selfish, he thought to himself. Pathetic.

That single thought was enough to deter his work. As selfish and determined as he wanted to be, it wasn't suited for the desk he was currently sitting at, in the cottage he'd been living in for the last five years.

After an hour of struggle to keep certain thoughts from flooding his mind, memories from another lifetime ago from playing in front of his eyes, he gave up.  
If Remus and Teddy were willing to extend the branch, he was going to accept it, he had decided. But that wasn't enough to keep him where he was.

Needing to be out of the house, needing room to breathe properly, he left his cottage and traveled the short distance to the village square. The cool, salty air would clear his head while he shopped for his ingredients.

**####**

"Are they here?" Draco said as he poked his head into the open bathroom door. Severus had finished replenishing his stock of common home potions and was now storing them away.  
It wasn't rare for Draco to arrive at the cottage to spend his lunch hour with Severus. Truth be told, Severus had been expecting him all morning.

Severus looked over his shoulder at the boy. Draco had been acting oddly since he learned of the planned outing to the park. Suspicious as he was, Severus kept his inquiries to himself. For whatever reason Draco was acting the way he was, he'd break down and confess soon enough. Before Remus and Teddy's imminent arrival, surely.

"Would I be here, stocking the medicine cabinet if they were?" he asked simply and sarcastically. Draco pursed his lips at this before he walked away.

Just as Severus was finishing, Draco walked back in and sat himself at the edge of the claw foot tub. He kept his gaze low to the ground and rubbed at the back of his neck; normally, his posture was perfect, but when he was upset or worried, his narrow shoulders slumped.

"I wanted to be here for that dinner, you know?" he said without preamble.

Severus clicked vials together as he straightened a line on the shelf. "You were busy with work." The tone Draco had taken, one that he only ever used with him or his mother was an absolute dead giveaway, as if Severus had needed that much to gather the truth.

Really, all he needed to do was to look into those pale, glassy eyes. It was the first to show, and that was always the tell Severus caught first.  
"I know, but I wish I hadn't been," he said with a bit of a sigh. "He's family, you know, the little one."

"Mother, she still has bad days. And when her sister died, she fell apart again. She would go on and on about family and how she had wished she could have reconciled with my Aunt. I hadn't paid it too much mind at the time, but now," Draco trailed off, gesturing mildly with his elegant hand.

"Professor Lupin is a kind man, isn't he?" he looked up with his grey eyes. "I haven't any other family, not really. I thought, perhaps, he wouldn't be opposed to me visiting with my cousin sometime?"

Severus didn't show his emotions very often. But now, looking at how genuinely sad and desperately hopeful his Godson looked, he couldn't help but show the concern in his own eyes as he spoke to him.

"Lupin, is an aggravatingly kind man. I think, if you spoke with him on the matter, he would be willing to allow his son to know his cousin," he said as he took a small step towards the boy.

Reaching his hand out to squeeze Draco's shoulder for a moment, Severus added, "He, however, is not your only family, Draco."

The blonde boy smirked and nodded, "Bloody bleeding heart, you are, Sev." He could see as much as feel the relief of tension in his shoulders as Draco stood up and smiled a bit more fully.

Severus snorted at the nickname, but patted him once more on the shoulder before leading them out to await their guests.

**####**

They hadn't waited too long when they heard a faint knock at the door. Severus had expected them to Floo through. Draco stood up instantly and made for the door. Opening it, he greeted his cousin and his father with a wide smile.

Remus was a bit taken back by the dazzling smile on the young man.

"Healer Malfoy, it's nice to see you again," Remus said as he and the mousy-haired boy entered the entrance hall. "Teddy, you remember Healer Malfoy, don't you?"

"Of course," Teddy said with a noticeable gulp. He hadn't expected Healer Malfoy to be there for his visit with Severus. Seeing the tall blonde in his Healer's robes was a bit frightening. "Hello."

Draco nodded, as he watched his cousin cling to his father's arm. "Hello," he said. Severus appeared just as the smile wiped from Draco's face.

"Hi, Severus!" Teddy greeted, his nervousness leaving him instantly. Draco frowned.

"Hello, Teddy. Remus," Severus said, as Draco left the hall and walked into the kitchen.

Though Teddy didn't notice the sudden tension in the suddenly cramped hall, Remus had. He looked at Severus and said, "Are we interrupting anything?"

Severus shook his head, "You can have a seat. I'll be just a moment."

Severus followed in the direction Draco had taken and the two guests made their way to the sitting room.

"Sulking, are we?" he asked walking in and placing a mild silencing charm on the doorway.

Draco, indeed, sat at the table sulking. "He was frightened of me, the little one. I hadn't said a word to him and he was shrinking back from me."

"And so you've given up on your hope to know your cousin?" The taller man asked, his arms crossing over his chest. The feat wasn't nearly as impressive as when he wore his robes, but it still made others squirm in their seats.

"It was a foolish idea," Draco said with a huff and a pout. Sometimes, he knew, he needed Severus to act like his Head of House, but often, he just wanted to sulk and not have to worry about what snaky remark his Godfather had for him.

"You go on. I'm going to have lunch and be on my way," he said, practically rolling his eyes.

Severus snorted, "I'd take 10 points for you lack of ambition in this particular endeavor. Perhaps you aren't as interested in it as you previously thought?" He was subconsciously taking on his professor persona, though he did know Draco hated it.

"As I said, it was foolish. My patients hardly want me near them, why should I have expected this to be any different?" Draco said as he played with the badge clipped to a pocket on his robe.

That statement forced Severus to break his stance. He sighed, Draco was so moody sometimes. It was difficult to know what he needed. Before Severus could say anything, Draco stood up and walked out. He passed the couch where the two guests had been talking quietly, and grabbed a handful of powder.

"Are you leaving already, Draco?" Remus said, stopping him. Draco had turned back, "Yes. I have work to see to. Do enjoy the park." He barely spared a glance to the little boy, and didn't notice how he didn't look quite as frightened before.

**####**

At the park, while Teddy was playing, Severus and Remus had sat on a bench and chatted for a half hour about the village. Severus pointed out a few of the locals he knew, and managed to not say anything entirely too scathing about them each.

When the little boy was busy showing off his metamorphic abilities to the other children, Remus broached the subject of Draco storming out of the cottage, explaining why Teddy had initially reacted the way he had.

"He was frightened, is all. We don't do well with Healers, us Lupin men," he had explained.

Severus nodded, glad to know he could now assuage Draco's fears.

"I suppose that is more than understandable. Two unregistered werewolves running into an ex-Death Eater, now Healer, must be a bit unsettling. He'll understand. He only wants to establish a relationship with what little family he has left."

Remus shifted his position. It was silly, he knew, because there were plenty of things Severus didn't know about him. And really, this particular secret wasn't nearly as big as the other secrets Severus already knew of him. Still, the statement about being an unregisted werewolf made him uneasy.

When Remus didn't respond more than a nod, Severus inexplicably felt the need to defend his Godson.

"The war wasn't kind to him," he started. "He lost his father to Azkaban, his mother is a mess more often than not, and while he is an extraordinary Healer, his motives are repeatedly questioned via that louse, Rita Skeeter. He's had very few to support him, and with a fellow ex-Death Eater for a Godfather at the head, it's been difficult."

"He's only now becoming the man he truly wishes to be, unafraid of what others will say of him and his past. If you're reluctant to hear him on the matter, I can tell you, I'm only afraid he may end up spoiling the child."

Hearing that usually so sure, and so smooth voice speaking so sadly, Remus forgot his own trivial insecurities. When he'd turned and given the man his full attention, the look on his face was heartbreaking, he thought for a moment. So unlike Severus in its openness and sadness, but still with that haughty, stubborn air of pride he was used to.

"I can hardly object to that; and even less can I begrudge two boys in need of family," Remus said finally pulling his gaze away to look out at his son playing with another young boy.

"We have quite the extended family, of course, what with Harry, Hermione, the entire Weasley bunch, but he hasn't many blood relatives. Not any that he sees very often, at least. We've stopped here before, on our way to visit family, but I'm pleasantly surprised to have found it here."

"Draco sounds as if he could really use family. Though, he seems to have an excellent godfather to watch over him." He offered the slightest smile then, still watching his son and giving him a wave when the boy looked back.

"Thank you," Severus said very quietly. Remus suspected the other man wouldn't want him to make a big deal about it, so he quietly acknowledged it with a nod.

"I do hope you're open to having a five year old for a friend, as well; Teddy's been so looking forward to today. He really likes you, and he'll like Draco, I think." Remus paused for just a moment, letting his now-neutral face turn into a smirk, his eyes glinting in the sun, "I dare say, I rather enjoy your company myself, Severus."

"And in three visits, I've surprisingly not grown too annoyed with either of you." Severus said without pause for thought.  
Remus chanced a glance to the man beside him. His sarcasm held no venom, as they might have years ago. He nodded, yes, he certainly was enjoying his company.

####

On their way back to Severus' home, Remus carried his son, who was tired from an entire afternoon running around the park, climbing trees, and playing tag with a few local kids whom he had met. They walked past a couple of shops and the market where they'd first bumped into each other. It was a quiet town, and Remus could understand why Severus had settled here.

The village was made up of both wizards and muggles, Severus had explained, but there was no hiding magic. The muggles who lived there had all grown up with wizarding family members - sons or daughters, grandchildren, or they had married a witch or wizard.

Remus breathed in the cool ocean air; as they drew closer to Ocean Hill Cottage, Remus could smell the woods just beyond. He hefted Teddy a bit higher in his arms and turned to see Severus' relaxed face. For an instant, Remus was almost sorry he had barreled into his quiet life here by the woods and just by the ocean. The life obviously suited him well. He couldn't ever remember seeing Severus so relaxed.

**####**

"Wotcher, Teddy!" Teddy heard a familiar voice calling out as soon as he and his father Flooed in. He leapt into the arms of his godfather, who was sitting at their kitchen table with a cup of tea and a discarded plate.

Remus hadn't been expecting Harry, but it wasn't odd to find him having a cuppa when they arrived home from the market or some other outing. Really, Harry came and went as he pleased. He had a flat he shared with his friends, but usually he split his time equally between the two.

"Harry, how are you?" He said simply, patting the young man's shoulder as he walked past him to the tea kettle and the boxes of food on the counter.

"As good as ever," Harry replied, trying to mimic the faces Teddy was making at him. "I grabbed some takeaway after work, and I thought you might be getting a bit tired to cook dinner tonight. With the moon…"

"A week away?" Remus finished for him, turning to look over his shoulder.

Harry had the decency to flush a bit. "Yeah, I thought it was too early to use that one."

Remus smiled warmly and sat down with his cup of tea. "You needn't make excuses to visit, Harry. This is your home as much as it is ours. You know that."

Now, Harry smiled. "I do know that, it's just that I've been busy with work, you know? I haven't been around as often and after Teddy's accident, well, I thought maybe I ought to be." Remus couldn't help but feel a bit of sadness when he looked at Harry.

For all they'd overcome, all that they've moved past, Harry still always felt he needed a purpose. Most of the time, Remus felt confidant that they'd broken his need to be their "protector," but sometimes it crept back without much notice.

"Don't worry about us, Harry. We manage just fine, and you certainly don't need to bring takeaway as an excuse to come over. We're always happy when you come home." He smiled, willing Harry to know this to be true. "You're a busy man, but you always have time for us."

"Busy being the Chosen One," Teddy giggled, sitting on his knees, hunched over a picture he was drawing. He knew how much godfather pretended to hate that. They'd teased him about it so often, it had helped to keep his anger in check when others said it.

"Quiet, you," Harry said with a smile while quickly levitating the crayons out of the little boy's reach. "It's always nice to be home to torment this one after a rough day."

After another moment, Harry set the crayons down. Teddy laughed, doing his best to cover them all with his small hands.

"But really though, we do love when you bring takeaway," he said cheekily, his hair turning a bright green color, a shade he only really ever used for Harry.

Remus and Harry laughed. They weren't the most conventional family, but Remus' heart beat for them both.

"Are you telling me you're hungry, my cheeky little cub?" Remus asked finally. Teddy's eyes grew big as saucers and he nodded his head enthusiastically.

"So, where've you two been all afternoon?" Harry asked aloud.

"Teddy and I were just out visiting friends. All day, actually. I am rather glad you brought dinner." Remus answered with a chuckle, spooning food onto a plate.

Harry smiled, but was still curious. "Friends?" he questioned. He'd just been at the Weasley's himself, where else could they have spent the entire day?

"An old man like me still has a few," Remus teased, slightly cringing at his poor choice of words. Harry hadn't said anything, which meant he wanted more of an answer.  
Remus sighed, he was going to have to say something eventually. Now was as good a time as any, he supposed. "We spent a lovely afternoon with Severus Snape, if you most know."

Harry very nearly shot tea out of his nose at the sudden announcement. He coughed a few times, Teddy, whose hair had turned black and a bit longish, giggled from the other side of the table.

"Alright, Harry?" Remus asked.

"Professor Snape? You were with him, where?" Harry said finally, hardly believing the words.

"Yes, Teddy and I ran into him week before last, and we invited him to spend the afternoon with us today." Remus paused to look at his surrogate godson. He expected the man to look shocked, as well as confused and probably a bit angry. And he certainly did.

"We had a nice time, didn't we, Teddy?" Teddy nodded and smiled.

"We went to a park, and had ice cream afterward. And Severus taught me which plants were best for potion brewing," he said.

Harry was still reeling at the news, too much so to even bother replying to his godson.

Severus Snape? He had spent months after the war trying to find him. After the trials though, he'd just vanished.

"Where?" he asked again, but wasn't surprised to get another sigh from Remus.

"Harry, you know I won't tell you that," Remus replied softly, with a professorial tone. "I won't violate his privacy or," he paused here. "Or his friendship."

It took a beat longer for bits to click together in Harry's mind.

"He's the man who helped you when Teddy hurt his arm, isn't he?" Remus nodded. "And his Healer friend, it wasn't Malfoy, was it? Tell me it wasn't, Remus. If anyone at St. Mungo's fount out Teddy is a -"

"Son, why don't you take your dinner into your room, careful not to spill please," Remus interrupted. Teddy had been paying more attention to the conversation than his food, but as always was the case when grown-up conversations got interesting, he had to leave the room. Teddy sighed and tried his best not to pout as he walked away.

"I'm sorry, Remus, it's just that, it isn't safe to let people know. You know that." Harry continued, a bit quieter.

"Yes, believe it or not, I do understand what it would mean if it got out that Teddy was a werewolf. He'd be marked, and registered, and tracked wherever he went. Just like the rest of us."

Remus usually wasn't bitter about his lot in life. He had resigned being bitter about being a werewolf long ago. He was still angry, of course, but didn't often say a word about it.

"Remus, I've told you, that number on your chest is just that. No one is tracking you at the Ministry. I wouldn't let them." Without really knowing, Remus rubbed gently at the string of numbers tattooed across his collarbone. "I worry about Teddy, is all. But you're more than capable, as his father and all, I suppose."

Harry spoke with a laughter in his eyes. Remus nodded again, letting his surge of anger slip. "Thank you, I do try," he said, patting the boys arm.

"I'm sorry I won't tell you where he is living. It's his secret to tell, not mine. He's content there. As for Healer Malfoy, he won't say a word. He doesn't strike me as the boy he used to be and he is Teddy's cousin, after all."

"That's right. I forgot he's a Black," Harry mumbled. How cruel is that, he thought to himself. His boyhood rival was blood relation to his godfather and his godson.

After a few tense moments, Remus picked up his cup of tea and took a sip. He didn't want to keep such a secret from Harry. Harry himself had confessed to once trying to find the man. That was years ago, just after the war. Of course, Remus had known that he was. He knew now that Harry still asked Minerva about him sometimes.

"If you wanted to write him a note," he said, placing his cup down. "I'd be happy to give it to him. I can't promise anything on his end, of course."

Harry stayed quiet, but nodded. He pretended to be much more interested in the invisible pattern he was tracing with his fingertip on the table top.

**####**

For a week, Remus caught Harry hunched over the desk in his room, or the kitchen table, and once sitting on the porch at the Burrow. He hadn't said as much, but Remus knew he was writing a letter, or had been trying to anyway. More often than not, Remus found wads of parchment in the rubbish bin.

Much like Severus had explained of Draco, the years since the final battle were not kind to Harry. They weren't kind to anyone, really.  
Remus had nearly been left for dead in a corridor leading to the kitchens at Hogwarts.

He'd actually been hit with a Killing Curse, so he was told when he woke up two days later at St. Mungos. The protection spell placed on all those Harry had given his life for, coupled with his own lycanthropic body, had dampened the curse by Antony Dolohov. He had fallen unconscious and Dolohov had eventually been detained.

The first time he had gotten the chance to hold Teddy when he woke up had been the first time he had ever been thankful for his lycanthropy. Harry had faired no better than the rest of them.

For months afterward, Harry had said he was fine. Said that, without the constant worry of Voldemort, he'd had a weight lifted from his shoulders and was more than ready to put it all behind him.

Of course, the trial of Severus Tobias Snape had also kept Harry busy too.

He had spent hours in front of the new Wizengamot testifying, but for none more loudly or more determinedly than Severus. If he hadn't already been so proud of him, of how brave and caring he was, he would have been to see Harry demand justice for a man whom he had never particularly liked, nor had ever liked him.

Some people still had reservations about Severus, he had already admitted to casting the curse that killed Albus Dumbledore and to knowingly side with Voldemort and the Death Eaters when he was still just a boy, barely out of Hogwarts.

Severus had admitted to overhearing the prophecy and relaying it back to his master, which had eventually led to James and Lily's death, but not before he had given his allegiance to Dumbledore.

Upon hearing the news of Voldemort's defeat, the former Headmaster's portrait had led Aurors to a hidden cupboard in the office which stored a rather thick envelope with handwritten statements and letters written over the course of the sixteen years Severus Snape had been Dumbledore's man. Along with the envelope were vials of memories belonging to Dumbledore, memories that gave furhter truth to Severus' allegiance.

When Severus had heard about this, about the letters and memories, he had nearly wept with repressed emotions, so Remus had heard from Harry after that particular day of the trial.

Albus had always promised Severus a way out, had always guaranteed him his safety and freedom, but until he had seen the letters and memories himself, Severus has never let himself believe the old man. Especially not after what he'd done.

That trial had been especially hard on Harry too. He had difficulty keeping him emotions in check whenever they discussed Albus, and more than a few times, he looked ready to leave when his parents were brought up.

Remus, who had been present at the trial for testimony on Order business, had seen it for himself. That's when the stress had begun to be too much for him to hide properly.

**####**

After the trials though, he had still let Harry pretend to be okay.

Harry had kept busy with helping to rebuild the school, helping Hermione find her parents in Australia. He'd even spent a bit of time checking in on his aunt and uncle. Because there were still people out there who might want to hurt him, there was a chance that his relatives would be in danger.

Remus had suspected that Harry had really just wanted to see them. As terrible as they had been to him, in their last moments together, they had showed some kindness.

None of that had put at ease the boy's turmoil thought.

While Remus had known that Harry was not fine all those months, even he hadn't any idea just how terrible Harry was dealing. Remus had tried to get Harry to leave Number 12 Grimauld Place; had asked him to come and live with him and Teddy. Harry insisted it was fine staying there by himself; that he was no longer a child and hadn't been for a while.

He felt a ton of guilt when he thought about how long he'd let Harry stay there, with nothing but nightmares and memories of Sirius. He should have taken him away, dragged the boy kicking and screaming if he'd had to.

If he had done so, perhaps Harry wouldn't have bottled everything up for as long as he had. Remus had been a coward though. He hadn't wanted to be the cause of more grief for the boy.

Harry deserved better than him then, when it finally became too much and he had come to Remus and broke down in tears.

Much like Severus during the war and the subsequent trial, Harry had been on the edge for far too long.

Throughout the week, Remus caught himself worrying about Harry again. Whenever Harry got too into his work or anything he did, and started keeping to himself, Remus remembered those awful months after the war.


	4. Chapter 4

Thank you our everyone for the great reviews. They are so appreciated. I hope you won't be disappointed in this next chapter. It was a struggle to get through, but aren't they all?

Any and all feedback is welcomed, so please leave it.

Bebe Flow: Aw, I love Howdy! That alone was worth all this work. Haha.

For anyone curious, there will not be any Drarry here. Pure Snupin. :)

Further notes down below. Enjoy.

* * *

"Thank you for meeting with me, professor. Please excuse my tardiness."

Remus smiled at the young man who had joined him at the booth in the Leaky Cauldron.

"I'm hardly a professor. Please, call me Remus," Remus said. "May I call you Draco?"

Draco's blonde fringe fell into his eyes when he nodded. "And please, I hope you'll excuse my behavior that last time we met."

"Of course. It's all been straightened out," the older man took a drink of his pumpkin juice, letting the blush fade from Draco's face. "Were you busy at work?"

"Yes, I have a patient who had a bad reaction to some filthy back alley Wolfs-" Draco cut himself off and the blush crept back up his pale face.

To his credit, Remus didn't flinch. Instead, much to Draco's surprise, looked much more interested in the conversation. "Wolfsbane?" Remus asked, leaning forward.

Draco nodded, but was quiet. Finally, it dawned on Remus why the young healer was no longer interested in talking.

"Oh, I'm sorry," he said, pulling away and leaning as far back as the booth would allow. "Perhaps it wasn't the best idea to meet with me so soon after the full moon. I didn't think it would be a problem." Remus, who was quite used to this type of situation was ready to extract himself from it with his pride intact and his head held high.

Draco caught the movements though.

"I have no problem meeting with you, I wouldn't have asked you to meet with me, if I had," he said, his voice unwavering. "I simply lack proper bedside manner. I don't want to offend you in anyway."

Draco cleared his throat a bit and continued, "Yes, wolfsbane. He said he got it in Knockturn Alley, from a street vendor. He had a bad reaction to it. It's taken us this long to work the mess from his system. Even in his other form, his metabolism wasn't able to absorb it all."

Remus had already forgotten about his idea of fleeing. As a member of the board of directors for the Werewolf Rights Reform, he had already given his full attention to the case.

"Severus was able to counteract the most severe of the poisons, but it's not been easy. And with only two of us assigned to him, it's been a long forty-eight hours."

"There are only two of you working on him?" Remus asked, a bit baffled. Two Healers was enough for a number of magical maladies, but to deal with a werewolf reacting badly to a potion just after the full moon was cruel to all parties.

For two days before and two days after, Remus himself felt the moon pulling at him. All of the heightened senses and improved strength lasted throughout that time. While listening to Draco talk, he made a mental note to contact Hermione and inform her of the patient.

"Two, and Severus," Draco answered, his shoulders straightening with pride. "My assistant, she is quite capable, but as I said, it's been difficult. Severus is my go-to when I need any further assistance."

"I'm the youngest healer at St. Mungos and you've read the articles in the Prophet. I get assigned the more uninteresting and less appealing patients." Remus heard just the slightest bitterness to his tone. "No matter, I am more capable then most of those idiots." Draco covered up proudly.

Remus smirked, "Indeed. We can be incredibly moody, irritable, and generally difficult after the full moon. We are monsters, after all. As much as we'd like to pretend that we aren't and that it goes away with the moon; it doesn't. The affects are lasting, to a degree. Especially so after a bad change. It's no wonder none of the other healers wanted to work with this young man. I have a hard time believing people still are willing to help drag me to bed after the moon sometimes. I spend those days before and after wanting nothing more than to leave my own body; to get away from myself. How can they stand it? What they do for me, and what you're doing for your patient, is very commendable, Draco."

Draco's eyes had narrowed when Remus looked up from his glass.

"Why do you say that?" Draco asked curiously. "Severus said you were a kind man, but you don't sound so kind now. You sound rather surprised that anyone is interested in helping a werewolf at all," he said rather bluntly.

Two of those statements took Remus aback. Firstly, Severus had described him as a kind man. Secondly…

"Is that how I sound?" he asked, his brows furrowing.

"Yes," Draco replied smoothly.

"I suppose I do sound bitter. I am sorry if I come off as unappreciative or unwelcoming of people like yourself who are willing to help others like me," Remus said, a bit uashamed of himself.

Remus took a moment to collect his thoughts. "It's true, everything I said. It's hard to balance two minds sometimes, one wins out over the other eventually, before they go back at it. And sometimes, it's easier to let one win a battle every once in a while."

"It helps that I am an outside party to your friends. I imagine Potter refuses to hear any such comments from you," the other man said. Remus suspected that was partly true. Harry would never let him say anything like that, no matter how much Remus sometimes felt like he needed to release a bit of frustration.

"Perhaps your bedside manner isn't as poor as you think. A true healer will listen to his patients in order to better understand their needs," Remus pointed out with a warm smile.

He thought it rather endearing how easily Draco blushed at being paid a compliment. He wondered for a moment if that was a recent development. Unlike the days of his youth at Hogwarts, compliments and praise probably only came from his mother and godfather nowadays.

"About this patient, would you mind, if I sent Hermione Granger to meet with him sometime this week?" he asked.

"Granger?"

"Yes, she works very closely with the Reform. She's helped write and pass some of the new laws, and works on independent werewolf cases in her spare time."

"Always the over achiever, I remember," Draco snorted.

Remus laughed. "Yes, that's our Hermione."

"Give her my card," Draco said, pulling a card from a small silver case, the name Malfoy engraved in a brilliant green. Remus pocketed the card.

"My patient hardly looks like a monster now. Of course, I understand what you were saying before. I had the pleasure of spending time with Fenrir Greyback, after all," Draco said.

Remus' jaw set tightly, his right hand gripped the handle of his glass and his left clenched into a tight fist reflexively.

"He is a monster, in both human and werewolf form," Draco had a sneer on his face. He shuttered at what business Draco would have had with him.

Draco's eyes were grey and full of hate for the man he was speaking about. "He was never a Death Eater, but he was worse than some of them, in far uglier ways." Remus only clenched his fist tighter when he thought about why Draco would have such a strong opinion of Greyback.

"My parents, and Severus, did their best to keep me away from him, in blatant ways in front of the Dark Lord even. But the way Greyback looked at me sometimes, it was disgusting; makes me ill to think about it now. I may have disliked you, and treated you poorly, but I never hated you like I hate him. Not even when I was telling the other Slytherins what you were."

Remus swallowed once to loosen his jaw. He took a deep breath.

"I am very sorry that you had to endure his company for however long as you did," Remus said, only slightly through his teeth. "He is a disgusting being, indeed - the foulest of all werewolves and humans."

Letting the anger seep from him, he tried his best to smile, "Your parents and Severus did well to keep you away from him. And I'm glad to know you don't consider me in the same company has him."

Draco shook his head, "It was more anger than hatred, why I did what I did. Severus said you had nearly attacked him, it was a bit overwhelming to find out, so I did what he asked. It was justified by our fear and anger, at the time."

"It took meeting Greyback to understand that that justification was hardly that; you are nothing like him. I can't speak for my godfather, but I am sorry for how your tenure ended." The apology was said so quietly Remus almost hadn't heard it, and may not have if it weren't so soon after the moon.

"Fear makes us react in unexpected ways. I certainly don't hold a grudge about it now, nor did I then even," Remus said, hoping to assuage any fear or guilt the boy might feel about it. "I promise not to hold it against you when you ask about spending time with Teddy."

**####**

Remus returned home from his day at the bookshop very content. Not only had it been a good day at the shop, but he had had a nice lunch with a nice, young man. A nice young man he had only ever known as a boy and a Death Eater's son. He had never condemned him for his actions during the war. He was just a boy at the mercy of sadistic and terrifying men and women with devious mindsets. However, he hadn't expected Draco to be as nice… perhaps nice wasn't the best word for it, but certainly he never expected Draco to be so raw and magnetizing. He wore his feelings on his sleeve for anyone who was paying close enough attention. He hadn't the ability of his godfather to hide them so well.

And he reminded him so much of Sirius. Draco was a Black after all.

Both a bit rough on the outside, but you couldn't help but be drawn to him when you got over the exterior. Remus was happy that he could provide something so great as family for the young man. Remus supposed he could say the same about Severus, as well. He'd never do so out loud, of course, unless he wanted to be hexed to oblivion.

Draco deserved to have family that would love him without all the baggage of his past. Teddy would learn to love him or simply being his cousin, Remus thought to himself.

After putting a roast into the oven for dinner, Remus set about doing some very light cleaning before heading over to the Burrow to collect Teddy. Two days after the moon and with the excitement of a good day, he was still a bit restless. He managed to get quite a bit done before he left their quaint little home for the busyness of the Burrow.

Teddy and Remus lived simply. They had a nice home, one that was theirs, and Harry's. It didn't hold any painful memories of Dora or Andromeda. It was their safe haven from everything else.

They lived in a nice area, but they didn't have overly attentive neighbors. They were kind, so if they happened to notice anything weird around the full moon, no one said anything.

Teddy had a few friends, but made sure to never change his features around them. If they asked where he went to school, he told them he studied with his aunty Molly and he learned all the regular things a five year old learns. It was all true, of course, but he never let it slip that she also taught him about magic.

And he certainly never let it slip that he and his dad happened to be werewolves. Because his friends were muggles, not because he should be ashamed of what he was.

Remus and Harry, and his gram, and Molly, and Hermione, and all the Weasleys, and Minerva, and anyone who knew him, made sure he knew that.

Teddy knew not everyone felt that way. While he was taught to not be afraid or ashamed of what he was, he also learned to not share that bit of information because some people were afraid of werewolves. He learned too, that not all werewolves were like him and his dad. There were werewolves who attacked people, who were careless about the safety of others.

Remus tried to hide the tattoo across his collarbone, but when he and his son sat together waiting for the full moon, it was impossible to do. That number registered him with the Ministry, gave them permission to track his every move, to walk into his home at their will. The number required him to report to the Ministry how, when, and where he got his Wolfsbane every month.

He'd gotten the number just after the war, when the Ministry decided it was the best way to protect and simultaneously keeping track of the werewolves. He'd gotten the tattoo not because he believed it was the right thing to do, but because it was the best option at the time. It was a publicity stunt, but one that was the best of a bad situation.

Harry promised it wasn't active. No one was watching Remus. Teddy was safe from the Ministry. Knowing that the tattoo served some good and that he wasn't being tracked and his son was in no danger, he didn't mind it so much. It embarrassed him, but no one ever saw it if he could help it.

Those numbers didn't mean anything really. Not if his family was happy. And they were, he figured, while he dusted the top shelf of the bookcase in the study, his stomach full from the dinner he'd shared with his son, who was tucked in bed now.

Remus smiled contently at no one but himself and thoughts of his family.

The light weight in his pants pocket, of the letter that Harry had given him earlier at the Burrow, did make him wonder how much longer they could all be happy before something inevitably happened to break their track.

He pushed that thought to the back of his mind as he made his way up the stairs to his bedroom. He let himself think about much happier things; he considered the best day for Draco to come over for supper. It occurred to him that he hadn't asked about the other man's work schedule. Letting his lips curl ever so slightly, Remus supposed he'd have to write to Severus and ask him about that. And invite him over as well. It would probably be best if Severus was there too, when Draco came over.

That would be a perfect excuse to write to Severus, Remus thought to himself as he slipped into bed. Truthfully, for the last week, he'd been considering what he might be able to write to Severus about for it to seem casual enough. He thought Severus was certainly open to putting the past behind them finally, but he didn't want to push too hard too quickly. The letter from Harry was a good excuse to write or even visit, but he didn't want that to be the only reason.

Remus fell asleep easily that night. His face graced with a tiny smile when he thought about Teddy and Harry, and the possibility of including Severus and Draco into their tight knit, though unconventional, family. The two of them would fit in quite nicely, was his last thought before his eyes had closed.

**####**

Severus ignored the grumbling of his stomach.

When it rebelled against him and growled even louder, he cursed himself.

He should go up and eat, he knew. If he did though, he'd miss the color reaction in the potion he was working on. This potion in particular was important; he'd have to wait it out just a couple more hours.

**####**

When the potion had finished, Severus cleaned up a bit before making his way back up to the main floor. He was tired, and against his will, his body ached from having worked for so long. He wasn't a young man, anymore, he hated to admit. But it was true. Men his age weren't meant to work on their feet for so long.

He was a perfectionist; he had standards to meet of himself. Eighteen continuous hours of potion brewing was difficult on anyone; as a young potions master he'd have been just as tired as he was now, he reasoned.

Severus contemplated skipping dinner and heading straight to bed as his stomach had finally given in and stopped its incessant pleading. When he finally opened the door from his lab into the kitchen, he immediately noticed the distinct smell of his favorite curry. Of course, his stomach perked up at it.

On the table, he saw takeaway containers sitting under the sheen of a temperature charm keeping them warm. He wondered when Draco had stopped by as he sat down to eat.

Draco was the only one who could have entered the cottage while he was down working.

He snorted, reading the note left on the table alongside the food. In an elegant scrawl befitting a Healer with the name Malfoy, the small bit of parchment read only one word - EAT.

While he was no longer a young man, he felt completely satisfied having worked so hard for so long.

Before, years ago, he'd have been satisfied working with only scholarly initiative urging him, but now, in this case, his justification and satisfaction came from that note.

He was fueled, now, by the concern his godson had expressed the previous day. A patient of his was not faring well with ordinary means and Draco had been worried there wouldn't be much else he could do.

He spent the previous night's dinner telling his godfather about his patient, who seemed to be getting worse. As a boy, Draco had never been overly concerned with anyone but himself, his family, Severus, and his closest friends. The boy then would have listened to the man's words now and walked away without a second thought.

He was indeed a man now; one who cared very much about his profession and his duties, and while he never said as much, the patients he took care of.

Something that Draco had said about the patient had triggered something in Severus' mind. He remembered something he had once read years before, something that he had been researching for Albus.

He and his godson had spent the rest of the evening going over texts and notes, trying to work out something that may be of use to them.

Finally, they had the base of something that could come in handy. Draco had spent a couple of hours brewing the necessary starting bases and prepping the ingredients for the final potion. When he was through with that, Severus took over.

Severus was quite pleased with the potion they had now created, as he made his way up the staircase to his bedroom. He was confidant it would either work as intended, or have no difference at all.

At the top of the stairs, he noticed the door at the far end of the hallway was open. That was Draco's room. Draco must be staying the night, he thought to himself.

While Severus was happy to help his godson and this patient, who obviously needed special care after foolishly taking a potion purchased in some back alley, he was also already considering other changes he could research and test to stablize a similar potion to counteract and cleanse the body of the poisons in the Wolfsbane. And to perhaps there can be something to aid in easing the pains brought on by the transformation itself.

As he lay with his hands folded on top of his abdomen, he wondered briefly before falling asleep, what other werewolves have gone into dirty, back alleys in hopes of finding something to ease their pains, or to end them completely, as he supposed the yound man had been searching for.

**####**

"Severus? Are you home?"

Severus didn't regularly get many Floo calls, so when he heard that familiar voice coming from the grate in his sitting room, he quickly put down the toast he was eating and walked over.

"Yes, I'm here, Lupin," he said walking into room.

"I'm not bothering you, am I? I was wondering if I might pop over to discuss something with you," Remus asked. He was a bit tired after spending the day shelving books in the shop, but more weary after having talked to Hermione, who had come to the shop after visiting the werewolf patient at St. Mungos.

Severus nodded, "You may come through."

Remus' face disappeared from the fireplace and in just a few moments had popped through, dusting off a bit of ash from his jacket.

"It's nice to see you again, Severus," he greeted, smiling.

"And you," Severus replied. He chastised himself for having already forgotten how to cordially communicate after a week. "How are you and Teddy?"

Remus followed Severus back into the kitchen.

"We're fine, thank you," he said, taking a seat at the table while Severus pointed his wand at the kettle, setting it to boil.

"Tea?" he asked.

"Please."

Remus frowned when they had both settled down with their tea. He had the chance to clearly see Severus' face; he had dark circles under his eyes, he noticed. And his hands were stained with potions.

"You look tired, Severus. You've had a busy few days with Draco's patient," he stated more than asked. Severus nodded.

"I'm not sure you're aware, but I had lunch with Draco a few days ago. He told me about his patient. I sent Hermione Granger to see him, to see what, if anything, we could do for him,"

"She paid me a visit today at the shop; she said he is doing much better, after having taken your potion."

"Yes, Draco informed me that he was doing well. He should be fully recovered by the next full moon," Severus said, taking a sip of his tea. Remus snorted. Severus raised an eyebrow.

"The Severus I remember from years ago would be more proud of his efforts," he said. "Whatever it is you concocted, you saved that young man's life. On behalf of the Werewolf Rights Reform, Mr. Snape, thank you."

Severus snorted in a sort of self-deprecating way.

"A simple combination of poor brewing, aconite poisoning, and allergies," he corrected. "It's hardly worth praising as it will serve no purpose for anyone else. It was brewed specifically for him, keyed to his exact symptoms and allergies. It was luck that I was able to narrow down the possible problematic ingredients in the original wolfs bane."

Remus placed his cup down onto the saucer and waited until Severus looked up at him.

"And so it wasn't so simple, was it? Thank you, Severus, for helping that young man," he said finally, locking his eyes with Severus' onyx ones. "He'd have died, had it not been for you and Draco."

"I've not met him yet, but I can imagine how terrified he must have been to seek help there," he said, dropping his gaze for a moment. "Thank you, Severus, for helping him."

Severus' focus hadn't left Remus' and it was quite easy to realize the thanks wasn't on behalf of a party, but it was Remus thanking him for helping that young man, as no one had ever been so willing to help him.

Severus nodded, "you're welcome."

Remus swallowed the lump he'd just felt in his throat. He hadn't meant to be so dramatic, but then he hadn't expected Severus to be so casual about his efforts either. He supposed it wasn't too surprising however, given his apparent want to stay under the radar.

With sigh and clear of his throat, Remus said, "When are you free for dinner, Severus?"

**####**

After settling on a night that would fit with Healer Malfoy's busy schedule, Remus remembered the note he carried from Harry.

"Before I leave you, Severus," he started, reaching for the bit of parchment in his breast pocket. "I have a note for you. From Harry." Severus immediately tensed and Remus felt it right away.

"I've not told him where you are," Remus tried to explain. "I have no intention of telling him, though he has asked about you."

"What exactly did you tell Potter about me?" Severus said, steeling his body against the things he wished not to discuss.

"Harry is part of my family, a part of Teddy's, and when he asked who we'd been spending so much time with recently, I wasn't going to lie to him."

"He was a bit shocked to hear it was with you. Maybe even a bit upset. He asked about you and I said that you were doing well, that you seemed content here, and that I wouldn't betray your friendship to tell him where you call home now."

"I did, however, promise that I'd deliver a note to you, if he so wished to write to you."

Severus stared at the outstretched hand holding the folded note. He did his best to glare it into oblivion, but when that didn't work, he made the mistake of glancing up at Remus' kind eyes. He sighed inwardly, making a show to look away and much put upon, even as he reached to take the note.

Remus rewarded the acceptance with a kind smile to match.

"I made no promises as to whether you'd respond, but I do hope that you'll read it and that you'll consider it. Of course, I've not read the letter, but I can't imagine it would hurt."

"Can't you, Lupin?" Severus asked.

Remus was confused by the question, "I'm sorry?"

"Can you not imagine the hurt that boy causes? Are you not constantly reminded of all you've lost over the years? You must be, when you look at him and see James' face. Or hear Black's reckless excitement in his voice? When you stare into his mother's eyes, you don't feel some ache for a better life lived lifetimes ago?"

He couldn't quite place why he felt the need to explain himself. He never had the need to justify what he felt. But this, right now, was different.  
Severus wasn't simply trying to justify himself to anyone. He found that he, almost desperately, wanted Remus to understand what he felt, to acknowledge it and give him hope that his pain wasn't his burden to bear alone.

He absolutely had to understand this.

Remus swallowed hard. He couldn't deny it hurt sometimes to see so much of his friends in Harry. He was the best of them all, if a bit stubborn and mischievous as well. It did hurt, but more often than not, it was a good, comforting sort of ache that reminded him not just that his friends were gone, but that they live on through Harry.

"You're not wrong, Severus," he said finally, in a tired sort of way; as if he too was admitting to the ache for the first time. "If, to look at Harry, that's what you feel, I can, indeed, imagine it. I feel it too."

The two men stood, silently breathing and waiting.

"Is that how you feel, Severus?" The other man didn't answer, but the slight shift in his stance and the look in his eyes gave him away. Remus offered a sad smile in acceptance of that answer.

As much as he wanted to hear the words of confirmation from Severus, Remus knew it was too much to ask for just now. He understood that ache, and perhaps saying as much was enough right now.

The Severus he had known years ago would have never admitted to feeling any sort of hurt or pain. The mere fact that he was willing, and seemed to want Remus to understand his pain now, meant something.

"I'm sorry that you have felt this way, and for so long. And I'm sorry that I can't ease it anymore than I can ease my own aches. I can only remind you that it is no more Harry's fault that he looks like James, than it is Draco's for resembling his Lucius. I hope that you can find some acceptance in that."

"For now, I hope that you'll at least read the letter. And be on time to dinner on Thursday."

Within a few moments, Remus was gone. Severus would read the letter, but couldn't bring himself to promise any sort of reply. And he had every intention to be on time to dinner.

* * *

Basically, I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I mean, I know where this is all ending up, but I don't know exactly how we're getting there.

We're a mess, this story and I. Sorry for that, but please do keep reading and leave us feedback.


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